I finally decided to just stop all this nonsense and get myself a Nintendo Wii. After watching this site for days and about 10 unsuccessful bids on eBay, I finally scored one that came with two additional games for $350.

Here's the problem: I've got a book manuscript due in 9 days that's not quite complete yet, and if I open the damn game system, there's no way in hell I'm going to cross the finish line.

Now I'm in the unenviable position of having an incredible game system that's sitting in my closet, unopened, because I'm such a weak human being that if I even look at it, I'll open it, set it up and play the shit out of it.

Basically, I'm so impatient that I couldn't wait 14 days to buy thing, I'm sitting here getting tortured by it.

Good times.

Labels: books, Wii

This is my dog. His name is Webster Lowenbrau Wolinetz.

Labels: Webster

The last few days have been quiet around here for a reason: I'm working diligently on the first Y.P.R. book with my compadres. The manuscript is due to the publisher a week from Monday, so we're working pretty hard on getting it all lined up. As soon as is humanly possible, I'll give all of the pertinent details to my adoring fan base (read: the both of you).

I'll keep this blog loaded down with information as the book publishing process progresses. In the interim, you'll have to settle for what the blog normally consists of: links to articles about Connie Chung and rabid anti-Danish (the people, not the pastry) invective.

Labels: books, Connie Chung, YPR

Here is the thus far unconfirmed schedule for the Rangers/Sabres Eastern Conference Semifinal series:

Wednesday: Game 1 in Buffalo 7 p.m.
Friday Game 2 in Buffalo 7 p.m.
Sunday Game 3 at MSG 2 p.m.
Tuesday Game 4 at MSG 7 p.m.
Thursday Game 5 in Buffalo 7 p.m. *
Sunday Game 6 at MSG 2 p.m.*
Tuesday Game 7 in Buffalo 7 p.m *

*if necessary

I may be a homer, but I think the Rangers have a good shot to win this series. I'm not saying they'll sweep them, but I think they can beat them. If the Islanders did one thing this season to help the Rangers, it was drawing the Sabres in the first round. The Islanders exposed the Sabres' primary weakness, which is the lack of size on their front line. The Islanders got physical with their forwards, caused some neutral zone turnovers and created scoring opportunities. They lost the series in five games, which seems lopsided, but two of those games were decided by one goal and another was a two-goal margin with an empty-netter.

The Sabres are vulnerable, and the Rangers are scorching hot. The only possible issue for the Rangers is the long layoff, but the Sabres have been on the bench for almost as long.

Here's the prediction: Rangers in 6.

Labels: New York Rangers, Stanley Cup Playoffs

Dear Corey,

When mixing a speedball, which is better: two parts cocaine, one part heroin or one part cocaine and two parts heroin?

Thanks,
Confused in California

Labels: Corey Feldman, Corey Haim

I rarely watch the show Frasier, both when it was on and now that it's in syndication. I have nothing against Frasier, Kelsey Grammer, Jane Leeves or Seattle. I just never got into the show. But every time that I flip it on, I see the same episode. It's uncanny. I always see the episode where Fraiser is fighting with the guy in his building and he unfurls the large American flag from his one floor up balcony and obscures Frasier's magnifient city view. I've probably seen 15 total episodes of the show (out of like 250, since it ran for like 12 years) and I've seen that episode like 5 times.

I feel like this happens with every show that's on TV. I assume that some episodes draw better ratings than others, so they play them more frequently. This makes sense to me from a network standpoint. It's got to be frustrating for the habitual Frasier, who has to sit through the same episode more often than any other. But it really pisses me off. The only reason I'm watching Frasier in the first place is because it's the one thing on the air that I haven't seen 46,000 times, and every single time that I flip it on, I see the same fucking episode.

Anyway, I got to thinking about shows, both ones that I've watched over the years and ones that I haven't. And for just about every show that I sat and thought about, I picked out an episode that I'd seen many more times than any other episode. Here's just a few:

Scrubs, "My Way Home": the tribute to The Wizard of Oz", where J.D.'s trying to get home and Turk needs a heart, Carla needs courage, and Elliot needs brains. This is an outstanding epsiode.

21 Jump Street, "Hell Week": the one where they're trying to solve the student rape case in the fraternity, and Johnny Depp pledges the frat to infiltrate. I remember a scene where he had to sort silverware quickly under penalty of death or having to wear white after Labor Day or something.

Seinfeld, "The Pool Guy": where the pool guy wants to be Jerry's friend. I've probably seen every episode of Seinfeld like 10 times, but I don't like this one

Labels: 21 Jump Street, Frasier, Scrubs, Seinfeld, TV

I live 1/2 of a block from here. The background is midtown Manhattan. The foreground is Sheep's Meadow in Central Park. Today, it was 78 degrees out.

That is all.

Labels: New York City

Michael Kay pronounces Alex Rodriguez's name like "Rah-DRI-gez," instead of "Rod-REE-gez," like the other 6 billion people on the planet.

This is vexing to me.

Labels: Michael Kay, New York Yankees

Last night, I was watching Scrubs, and it was one of the episodes where Zach Braff was dating Mandy Moore in the episode (while simulataneously schtupping her in real life). Mandy's name in the show was Julie, and Braff starts airband-ing the song, "Hey Julie" by Fountains of Wayne. And as I'm watching, I'm sitting and thinking about how awesome that Fountains of Wayne album is (despite the insufferable "Stacey's Mom" song). So, I bust out the album and give it a spin, satisfied that I've quenched my thirst for Adam Schlesinger's voice.

Anyway, today, I'm catching up on my good friend Mr. Tobey's blog (he seems to be blogging reasonably regularly again. I give it 2 weeks), and lo and behold, he's got a post about picking up the new FOW album and has a playlist of songs that he put together based on concerts that he's seeing and albums he's picked up. First song? "Hey Julie"

I have no funny/clever comment to drop in here, other than that I think we share a brain.

UPDATE: Here's the mp3. (Right-click, hit "Save Target As ...")

Labels: Fountains of Wayne, Matt Tobey, Scrubs

Joe Posnanski, the brilliant baseball columnist for the Kansas City Star, is keeping up a blog. The blog has information about his new book, which you can purchase here, as well as tons of both well-researched and extemporaneous posts.

I've made my way through the first little bit of Joe's book and it's, as expected, outstanding. Buck O'Neil was one of the last true links left to the Negro Leagues and he spent most of the later part of his life spreading the word about its stars. This book is a nice post-script to Buck's life.

Labels: baseball, Buck O'Neil, Joe Posnanski

On the way back from Atlantic City, we were scanning the radio and found a show on NPR called, "Wait, Wait ... Don't Tell Me," a quiz show about strange news events of the week.

I'd never heard the show before (but then again, I don't have a car and almost never listen to the radio), but I really enjoyed it.

Labels: Atlantic City, NPR, Wait, Wait ... Don't Tell Me

According to NPR, home nail gun injuries are up 200 percent in the last 15 years.

The only thing I don't understand is why shoot your nails on when Lee Press-Ons are so convenient, cheap and easy.

Labels: nails, NPR

Kurt Vonnegut is dead.

There were a crop of exceedingly talented writers that came out of that World War II generation. Philip Roth is still (in general) practicing his craft at the highest levels. Joseph Heller is dead. Now Vonnegut. When you live 84 years on this planet, you've had a good run at it. It doesn't make it any less terrible.

I was 14 years old when I read "Slaughterhouse-Five" for the first time. It remains the best book that I have ever read.

Take note of the poem that appears at the end of the obituary in the New York Times (hyperlinked above and again here).

The world has lost another genius, and I fear that we're running out.

Labels: Slaughterhouse-Five, Vonnegut

Who watched Thank God You're Here last night? Very funny stuff (the first episode more than the second), but this was immediately moved to DVR for future tapings. The casts are really outstanding. They got a lot of people with very solid improv background. I was really impressed with the guy who hosts, The Soup (whose name I didn't know until yesterday night. It's Joel McHale.

I have to admit I'm reasonably impressed with the shows that are being selected for network TV lately. They've realized that the competition for viewers from cable is fierce. This has wrought both good and bad changes.

The good: they're taking some chances on TV shows that they may not have taken a couple of years ago.

The bad: they tend to pull the plug pretty quickly.

The good: successful shows are given money to succeed.

The bad: too much fucking reality TV. I get it. It's cheap (you don't have to write scripts or pay actors), but enough already.

Labels: Thank God You're Here, TV

There is one small difference between Coke that is Kosher for Passover and Coke that is not Kosher for Passover. The Passover stuff has sucrose in it, and it tastes like Coca-Cola used to taste before they started using cheaper corn syrup instead of sugar. Not only that, there's a conspiracy theory out there about this.

Apparently, true Coca-Cola fans (I didn't know that this group of people had formed a coalition) stock up during the Jewish holidays.

NPR did a story about it three years ago. You can listen here.

Labels: Coca-Cola, NPR, Passover

Last night, after the Rangers game, I went down to the subway to catch the A train home. When I got on the train, there were two young black kids standing in the car. They were sort of gesturing at each other. And I sat down, put on my iPod and watched them out of my peripheral vision. It took me a minute, but I realized that one of the kids was deaf and they were signing at each other. For some reason, I was surprised.

Now, I've spent a considerable amount of time thinking about this and I'm wondering whether I'm a passive racist or just a total moron. I haven't yet come to a conclusion.

Labels: A train

This displeases me.

Nonetheless, I owe my adoring public some words.

It's Passover, which means no bread, but not just no bread. No pasta, no rice, no wheat of any kind. No fun, really. No fun at all.

Labels: fun (no), Passover